Chapter 1The Sloth and the CEO

I am the villain’s canary. But there's a catch: I’m incredibly lazy.

When the villain went bankrupt, the System told me to humiliate him, dump him, and reignite his fighting spirit so he could make a comeback.

I said no.

Too much effort to yell.

Roman Sterling gripped my chin, his voice fierce: "Everyone else left. Why didn't you? Are you staying to watch me suffer?"

I yawned slowly.

"Too lazy to run."

His eyes reddened, and he muttered self-deprecatingly:

"I'm a failure now, a broke nobody. I can't give you the luxurious life you're used to..."

I patted his head.

"Okay, okay. Doesn't it tire you out to talk so much? Come here, let's take a nap."

So.

To keep me from starving, Roman pulled himself together. He worked three jobs a day, running himself ragged.

In the original story, this was the time he was supposed to be dating the heroine to deepen their bond.

Instead, Roman was at home, kneeling on one knee, meticulously tying the bow on my dress.

The System screamed:

"What is wrong with you people? You're breaking the script!"

* * *

I’m Linnea, the "canary" of the powerful Roman Sterling.

And I am lazy.

People say Roman is great at keeping secrets because, despite being with him for so long, there isn't a single photo of me online.

Well...

Actually, I just stay home all day.

Too lazy to go out.

Becoming his canary was an accident.

After college, I sent a resume to his company.

Desired Position: "Do little, earn much."

Bio: "Good taste."

Roman clutched that resume, thought about it, guessed, and still didn't understand.

Driven by curiosity, he interviewed me personally.

I explained: "It means 'good taste, lazy nature.'"

He frowned, confused. "Why didn't you write the whole thing?"

I took a sip of water.

Speaking at 0.75x speed, I said three words:

"Too lazy to."

Roman: "......"

Even though the interview was a disaster, I got the job.

Roman needed a professional canary to dodge a business marriage.

I weighed it in my mind—

High pay, low effort.

Work from home.

I have low energy and poor circulation.

Walk two steps, want to squat. Stand up too fast, black out.

But my sleep quality is top-tier.

Roman really appreciated that.

He's sensitive and gloomy.

Childhood trauma, bullied in school, stabbed in the back by business partners...

He's suspicious and tense.

Insomniac.

Every night, he uses me as a human body pillow.

Smells my shampoo.

Pinches my waist.

Then he relaxes and sleeps like a baby.

Besides sleeping, I do nothing. Every day I open my eyes to gifts and money transfers.

Truly...

The dream job.