Chapter 4My Brother’s Wrath

I raised a hand, gingerly touching my swollen, throbbing cheek. Then I just sat there on the floor, dazed.

I glanced down and saw the deep, red lines crisscrossing my palm where I had grabbed the broken glass. It was only then that I felt the sting. The pain, physical and emotional, finally washed over me.

Above me, I heard a sharp, panicked intake of breath. Robby stepped forward, reaching down to help me up. But before his fingers could touch me, I flinched away.

I scrambled to my feet on my own. Head down, I started toward my room.

Ian suddenly blocked my path. He looked at me, his expression a complicated mess of emotions, as if he wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words.

My brain felt slow, sluggish. It took me a moment to process what he wanted. Then it clicked.

I looked him in the eye and said, with perfect clarity, “Let’s break up. I’m ending it. It’s not your fault.” I added, “I hope you and your new girlfriend will be very happy together.”

Ian stared at me, completely stunned. There was no relief on his face, only shock.

I didn’t understand what I’d said wrong. I had given him exactly what he wanted, so why did he look so unhappy?

It was too much to think about. I sidestepped him and fled up the stairs to my room.

I locked the door but didn’t turn on the lights. Moving by muscle memory, I went to my bedside table and picked up the photo frame that always sat there.

The thorns that surrounded my heart retracted. The storm of rage inside me finally subsided.

I sat on the floor, leaning against the bed, holding the frame. By the faint moonlight filtering through the window, I tried to make out the picture inside. But I had forgotten about the cuts on my hand. A drop of blood fell onto the glass. I frantically tried to wipe it away, but it only smeared, blurring the faces into a crimson haze.

I stared at it, a wave of despair washing over me.

It’s been five years. My parents died when I was young, leaving me with only my older brother. But five years ago, he left me too.

He had promised. He promised he would not only watch me grow up, but he would take care of me when I was old. We were going to be family forever, the best in the entire world.

He broke his promise.

I hugged the frame to my chest and curled into a ball on the cold floor.

“You’re not here,” I whispered into the darkness. “And now they’re all bullying me…”

The exhaustion was absolute. I closed my eyes, seeking escape. I expected another sleepless night, but this time, sleep came quickly.

I had a dream. It wasn’t of my brother. It was of Sean.

Flames licked the sky, thick black smoke churning in the air. In the distance, an explosion roared. The heat was suffocating, stealing the oxygen from my lungs. The acrid smell of smoke filled my nose and mouth. I stared at the world twisting and melting in the inferno, unable to tell if it was real or a nightmare.

But it was just as I had imagined it a thousand times before. I was curled in a corner, with no desire to escape.

The temperature climbed higher and higher. My skin felt dry and hot, as if it were about to cook. In the midst of the unbearable agony, a single, lucid thought cut through the haze.

So this is how much it hurt. This is what my brother felt when he died.

“…Nina?! NINA!!!”

The bedroom door was kicked open with a violent crash, and a desperate, frantic shout ripped through the haze.

Sean rushed in, smothering the flames that had begun to catch on my clothes with a damp blanket. He swept me up into his arms and carried me out of the inferno.

But when we reached the safety of a tree outside, his arms went limp. He let me drop to the ground. I let out a muffled groan of pain.

Sean was gasping for breath, soaked through with what was either sweat or water. His eyes were bloodshot as he knelt down and screamed at me, his voice raw with rage. “Why didn’t you run? Didn’t you see the fire? Are you trying to get yourself killed?!”

I slowly pushed myself up, leaning against the tree trunk. My gaze drifted past him to the firefighters battling the blaze, my mind a million miles away. His words didn’t register.

Sean’s face, normally so gentle and composed, was twisted into a terrifying mask of grief and hatred. There were tears in his eyes.

His voice dropped to a choked whisper. “Sometimes, Nina… I really wish I could just strangle you.”