Chapter 2The Runaways

I'm Sarah. My brother is Sam.

We are three years apart. We have a lot in common.

We are both pathetic simps.

He’s chasing Adrian, a stoic business tycoon. I’m chasing Julian, the wealthy heir to a real estate empire.

Our second commonality: We both like men.

Yes, my brother is gay.

When he came out, our parents almost had a stroke. Thankfully, Sam has been a chaos agent since birth, so their tolerance was high. They eventually accepted it.

My mom looked at me with deep concern. "Sarah, are you also..."

"No, Mom," I said. "I'm just like Sam."

Mom grabbed her chest. "You're a lesbian too?!"

"No! I mean, I also like men."

Mom put down the Xanax.

Our third commonality: We are terrible at dating.

I’m shy and slow. Sam is a flamboyant butterfly. He’s been throwing himself at Adrian for months, but Adrian is an iceberg.

Different methods, same result: Failure.

Sam sat next to me. "Forget him! There are plenty of fish in the sea. I'll find you some hot guys!"

"No," I said. "Your hot guys are all gay."

"Not all of them!" Sam paused. "Okay, most of them."

"No."

"Why are you so stubborn?" Sam started trash-talking Julian. "He's not even that great! He looks polite, but he's actually a manipulative sociopath! Haven't you heard of 'white on the outside, black on the inside'?"

I defended my crush. "Oh, and Adrian is better? He's just an ice cube. Black on the outside, black on the inside."

Sam flicked my forehead. "Hey! I'm trying to comfort you!"

I ignored him.

"I told you your method wouldn't work," he lectured. "You're too subtle. You make him homemade sandwiches and say you bought them. You go to boring galas just to see him, hide in a corner, and wait for him to say hi first."

Me: "..."

"You have to be direct! Like me!"

"But you failed too," I whispered.

"At least Adrian isn't engaged!" Sam shot back.

Ouch. I checked my phone.

A text from my best friend, Zoe.

Zoe: Sarah! Big news! That tycoon your brother is obsessed with? He's getting engaged too!

Zoe: What is in the water? Is there a BOGO sale on engagement rings?

Zoe: Is your brother making fun of you? Roast him back!

I looked at Sam.

He shivered. "What? Why are you looking at me like that? Are you... pitying me? You got it backward, sis."

I kept staring.

Sam’s smile faltered. "No..."

I nodded. "Yes."

Sam grabbed his phone. He typed furiously. Five minutes later, he put the phone down, eyes glassy.

"Pass me a beer."

I opened one for him. "Sam, are you okay?"

"Don't comfort me."

"I wasn't going to. I was going to say thanks. I feel much better now."

Sam flipped me off.

We drank in silence.

"Sarah," Sam said suddenly.

"Yeah?"

He looked like a mad scientist who just had a breakthrough.

"Kid, let's run."

"Huh?"