Chapter 1I Finally Let Go of My Lost Love

At yet another Montgomery family dinner, Chris's new female assistant sat right in the chair that belonged to me.

I looked at my husband. "She is sitting in the seat meant for the lady of the house. Do you have absolutely nothing to say about this?"

Chris rolled his eyes, his voice dripping with his usual annoyance. "If you can't be bothered to show up on time, don't cry about losing your seat. Sit in one of the empty chairs. If you don't want to sit, then get the hell out."

I opened my mouth to argue, but Chris's inner voice flooded my mind before I could speak.

[Come on, get mad. Tell me you need me. Tell them you belong right next to me. Prove you love me. That is the only way I feel safe.]

This time, I refused to satisfy his twisted cravings.

I just lowered my head and slowly slipped the diamond wedding band off my finger.

"Since there isn't even a place left for the lady of the house, I guess I am no longer needed here."

"Let's get a divorce."

The heavy ring hit the mahogany table with a sharp, crisp clink.

Chris's face drained of color. Even his parents, who had been quietly enjoying the drama, suddenly looked panicked.

Six years.

I had lived like this for six solid years.

Every single time Chris used his words like poisoned blades to cut me down, I never needed him to coax me back. All I had to do was listen to his desperate, begging inner thoughts, and I would foolishly run right back into his arms to make peace.

Over time, his family grew completely used to this toxic dance. His mother would even laugh and joke about it. She would say that an awkward, stubborn man just needed a wife who wouldn't run away no matter how hard he yelled.

So the moment I took off the ring, Mrs. Montgomery practically leaped out of her seat.

"Sundra... what is wrong? Are you just in a bad mood today? You are normally never this petty."

Mr. Montgomery slammed his fork down, looking stern. "This is a family dinner. Even if you are throwing a tantrum, you do not joke about divorce. Put the ring back on."

I let out a soft, dry laugh. "Oh, you know it is a family dinner? So when exactly did Assistant Lily become a member of the family?"

The older couple instantly choked on their words.

Chris stood up abruptly. His jaw was clenched so tight the muscle twitched. "Sundra, are you done being dramatic?"

"You want a divorce? Fine! Then get the hell out of my sight right now! This house doesn't welcome an ungrateful stray dog like you!"

Beneath those sharp, familiar words, his inner voice was a bleeding mess.

[Sundra, why? Why do you want a divorce? Are you throwing me away? Didn't you promise you would love me forever?]

[This is a sick joke, right? As long as I lose my temper, you will rush over and hug me. You always do.]

I had swallowed these agonizing, two-faced emotions for an entire decade.

When I first met Chris, he suffered from severe emotional trauma and a crushing inability to express affection. He literally could not voice his true feelings. He used the cruelest, most sarcastic words as a shield to attack anyone who tried to get close.

And I, like a fool, became the lucky girl who could hear his true thoughts.

Whenever he screamed at me to get out, his inner voice would be on its knees, begging: [Don't leave. I need you.]

Because my heart broke for him, I slowly fell in love with him.

Four years of dating. Six years of marriage.

Because I stayed by his side, he finally opened his locked-up heart. He stopped needing medication to function like a normal human being.

But over the past six years, a sick pattern emerged. He was gentle and polite to every stranger he met. Yet to me, his wife, he offered nothing but coldness and biting insults.

It was not like I never felt wronged. I cried. I hurt.

But his mother would always pat my hand and say that Chris was sick in the head. She told me he wasn't normal, that I needed to give him grace. She insisted his cruelty was just a front and that his heart belonged entirely to me.

Because I could hear his thoughts, I believed her.

Until his assistant, Lily, showed up.

Chris, a man who didn't possess a single romantic bone in his body, rented out an entire amusement park for Lily's birthday.

I had been admiring a certain diamond necklace for six months. He bought it without blinking and fastened it around Lily's neck.

He even brought her to our private family dinners.

His inner voice would chant over and over that he loved me, desperately craving my jealousy to soothe his deep-seated insecurities.

But as I looked at my seat, the seat I had earned through ten years of blood and tears, happily occupied by another woman while I was shoved into a corner...

I suddenly woke up.

I had been lying to myself this whole time.

Where a man puts his tenderness, that is where his love truly lies.