Chapter 3Both My Parents, Neither My Home

My friends looked terrified. Before they could even finish, Dad cut them off and threw them out.

"That's enough. Leave."

His face twisted with wounded sorrow.

"Ronald's dragging you kids down with him. Stay away from him, or you'll end up as ungrateful as he is."

My tears finally broke free as I fell apart and screamed at him, "Why would you say this about me in front of my classmates? What did I even do wrong?"

"Ha. If you're so scared of us showing your true colors, maybe you shouldn't have acted the way you did."

Mom lit up, practically thrilled, and pointed at me, shouting.

"See? This is exactly how he loses it. I told you, didn't I?"

She looked so pleased with herself, so righteous. Like driving me out of my mind was the single most rewarding thing she'd ever done.

My friends couldn't take it anymore. One by one, they got up and fled through the door.

Mom looked like she'd just won a war, and sighed with satisfaction.

"See that? Even your own friends can't stand you. Just how bad do you have to be?"

"They can't stand you!" I yelled and shoved past her and bolted for the door.

I made it to the entryway before I heard Mom's heavy footsteps closing in behind me.

A hand clamped down on my collar and yanked me back.

"Stop right there. What did you just say?"

Her lips trembled with rage. She raised her hand to hit me, then caught sight of the neighbors out of the corner of her eye.

The slap froze in midair, then landed on her own face instead.

"What did I ever do to deserve this? Why is God punishing me like this?"

The neighbors rushed over to stop her.

"Just talk it out. Don't hurt yourself."

Mom looked like a woman carrying some unspeakable grief, tears streaming down her face.

"It's bad enough he torments me at home. Now he's bringing his classmates into it too, making his father and me look like monsters.

"I don't even want to live anymore. I've given in to him at every turn. If it weren't for him, I would have gotten a divorce years ago."

She broke down sobbing and buried herself in Dad's arms.

Dad pointed at me, his face a mask of grief.

"He's driving us both out of our minds. All we ever wanted was for him to be healthy and happy. Why does that have to be so hard?"

For a moment, time seemed to stop.

The neighbors' voices lecturing me. My parents' wailing, so full of self-pity. All of it faded into nothing.

I started crying like a madman, slapping myself across the face again and again.

A flicker of coldness crossed my parents' faces. Then they just watched me in silence, like I was putting on another show.

Then a scream cut through the air beside me.

My body hit the ground hard.

…

When I woke up again, I was in a hospital.

Mom was outside on the phone.

"You have no idea. He's lost his mind again. I've suffered so much my whole life because of that kid. But what can I do? No matter what, he's still my son.

"Mm-hm. I know you feel for me."

She hung up, a look of satisfaction spreading across her face.

Seconds later, she called her older sister, Denise Cohen.

"Sis, you have no idea. I've thought about just ending it.

"Haven't I given my whole life for him? He's the only one in this house with both his real parents together. Why can't he ever be satisfied? It's just so hard on me."

She rambled on and on, and Denise spent a long stretch on the other end trying to comfort her.

Mom finally let out a long breath and hung up, looking pleased with herself.

She turned around, saw that I was awake, and the faint smile on her lips vanished.

She walked over, cold and unhurriedly, and started tidying up her things.

Light from the hospital hallway spilled in, making her look cold all over.

"Ronald, playing crazy won't get you anywhere."

I didn't say anything.

She turned to look at me.

"Since you're clearly not stable, you're not taking your finals this year."

My eyes snapped wide open, filled with dread.

She smiled slowly.

"This is for your own good. What if you actually got into college and hurt someone there? That wouldn't be good for anyone."

With that, she turned and left, locking the door tight behind her.